MNK's Log. PSSD Recov 12-18mo 10', 11m-16mo 18'. Treating hEDS/ADHD, Trauma, via HRT+/dex, Crnv, Ketmn. TEI?

[MNK99]

fasting... refeeding in 2018. i saw this movie. damned good. Hacksaw Ridge.

h on YouTube​

Hacksaw Ridge
War • 2016 • 2 hr 19 min
English audio

 

[MNK99]

 

[MNK99]

 

[MNK99]

GEt back on ashwagandha... / fodacia,/ terrestis? GORILLA MODE SIGMA? take for life? felt 9.5/10 9.9/10 and better than ever in 2019 on kingsblood (long term PCT... after TEI and after my 2 cycles of randro and 4andro).

or TEI?

some do awesome on test/dht boosters forever. AND it will lower my anxiety and allow me to feel the fear and do it anyways.

taking a test booster for life with some nice compounds or a couple like maybe kingsblod and gorilla mode sigma and my adhd medicine, would be perfectly fine for me....

also I guess magnesium and b a bit... and enzymes, HCl.

I had literally amazing digestion on the Kingsblood (from Strong Supplements). maybe it fucked me up socially a bit, (I am anxious, and disregard people all day even when I feel 10/10 and attract bishes for years straight. I was just really goal oriented).

OTHERWISE TEI and DEX.. and do it a couple years and quit.

Nothing wrong with taking some ayurvedic stuff forever (which basically you can do "cleaner" with gorilla mode sigma supplement or this other one, kingsblood). or just switch those and some herbs from TMO (regardless of source, as long as it is good quality). Possibly I feel way better on that rather than from test, anavar (considering I took test like 8-10 x maybe 15 x total... and that is like 2-4 weeks max and not even in a row. and Anavar like 3x). I think taking all that shyt in 2019 2020 I'd be better. I felt BETTER THAN EVER most of (LATE) 2018--2021... SO not sure wtf is happening.

But what isn't helping is anxiety, indecision around what I can do next. I feel like even if something helps me a ton... I may have to be on it forever, and going off of it may lead to severe depression.
And loss of function in work/studies.

Maybe couple a couple of these test bossters with electrolyte protocol will make me awesome again?

, and keeping my ADHD medicine will help me motivation, anxiety, mood, depression wise (NONE of the latter two and only mostly good anxiety tho ya i have tons of anxiety and ADHD anyways but it was gone the anxiety was mostly gone for a few years).

 

[MNK99]

Do these increase 5ar? KSM66 Ashwagandha? fadogia Agrestis? Tongkat Ali?

FOR SURE HERBS (TMO) helped me get stronger. Randro and 4andro were icing on the cake... and I stayed lean and mean and awesome on ashwagandha... at my goal weight and size pretty much and physique. Now I am not, I got some weight to lose, but I also took nothing for the last couple years... which wasn't good. Pretty much nothing, minus some test and anavar, and hcg.... I think sticking to hcg it could help a lot. Seems kind of hard to do... Maybe I should have done more cycles in 2020... damn it... I had a really good life and was very a athletic and focused and solid everywhere. Roadmaps of vascularity. 2018-2022...

2022 half way through I became very depressed - I suffered lots of pain from scoliosis (even though it is to a minor degree, the curve)... and I had work/life issues going on.

Hopefully I can improve agian. It feels horrible having optimal/amazing health where girls literally asked me out in public waved, and flirted, and cried when I cried, and literally asked me out on the elevator... to being super depressed again. Getting older... Gotta fix some things in life again. TBH.


ON the other hand i may have felt like a robot on ashwa.. but with clean perfect skin, nice body, and confident as fk after overcoming pfs (back then) and moving out on my own and being in the prime of my life (then) and finally not feeling like i had too much anxiety... like it was in the past. And nice clothes etc, I felt robotic in terms of interactions but I could have done amazingly well. I was such a lone wolf my time... cured, and fearful of getting sick again... and just trying to get into a professional school... and things got screwed up anyways. I feel really bad...


Surely they up LH and then 5ar. Quite certain, same with some of TMO's herbs. Hence, the longer penis and stronger erections, bigger balls, proper loads I had for 2-3 years.. or more.

 

[MNK99]

TRACE ELEMENTS surely safer.

but if one was to blast and cruise... the CREAM is better right?
I KNOW I've gone ... towards the dark side.

Blasting and cruising means no PCT. use small blasts.,.. 150-200mg and 80mg as cruise. twice a week. some shyt like that.

BUT ya... I did do coke 22-26 and drank (LOOKED DEAD SEXY AS FUCK AND WAS RIPPED a lot of that). i quit drinking 25 24 mostly and just did coke for academics and for chilling.../happiness.

SO coke.. then. DEXEDRINE after 26.5 and then blast and cruise in 30s???
might die right?

TEI is safer than that.

MEANwhile 2/3 first cousins, brother, cousin's wife... etc etc... all physicians. FML.

 

[MNK99]

PAID my dues. i fking fasted like 30d 2018. 5d here and there. 22hrs 24hrs evday for like 2 yrs. ate perfectly 2.5-3 yrs.
was cured. best TEI charts on whole site. wtf....

anyways PROBABLY THIS SHYT CAN BE DONE SAFER with... test cream and dht cream. PROBABLY would help mood, focus, and pfs... and scoliosis, DHT should help that, as per some Haidut studies.

Probably way better than injections. I did try 0.115 0.125 0.075ml a day for a time on TEST, last year, but I didn't stick to it.... 2-3 days a week is better for me maybe.

Test cream probably would be even better. I feel i am going backwards if i cycle randro/4andro again... what's next? fast 40 -50 days... then take ru.. then randro again??? WTF??? I met like 500 ppl and
made part of my life... just to go backwards?? THIS ISNT COOL. sorry mostly venting. i wish you all wells.


EDIT: doing em on own is way better probably than taking say... sigma... from MPMD. I've never bought any of his supps (ever) nor anyone's actually the last few years.
No creatine since early 2018. That's how cured as fk I was (I didn;t need it, I was taking choline, theanine, mg, b, enzymes, and randro/4andro). fks sakes. not sure how to quickly get back to killer health again.

water fasting would get me far... but I get depressed, over some major losses in life. And yeah, electrolytes/ tei may be the way to go for now. fast when I have more money/time.
----------------------------


RIP OCGUY. We spoke a lot on discord, when we were trading actually at times (crypto). And sometimes about this hackstasis stuff. I think it was heart disease, a heart attack or something. Thankfully not PFS. I hope he was happy in his last 2 years since we talked.

He was very down at times, I saw on Phelp (trash site, good dude but terrible site obviously). He had no progress for many years and TEI helped him 65 percent.

Anyways he was a good dude and I liked him a lot. My digestion was fixed but I tried this thing at times, it was nice. Just kind of a reminder in case I freak out... that he didn't think he could get better at times, and TEI or whichever HMTA he used, helped like 65% of his symptoms. And he used duta unlike me. So If I got whatever is going on now... if it is chronic ptsd, life situational and a bit of pfs or a significant amount... it is less than what I had in 2017.

 

[Mattie Devon]

It could have been ashwagandha that fucked you up again. I've seen plenty of people crash with pssd symptoms.

 

[MNK99]

Nah man I was perfect on ashwa sure I was kind of hyperfocused and zoned out... and didn't make friends as much... but that was 2019... and I didn't take jack shit till 2020 tongkat ali a bit.. and 2021... nothing major, besides vitamins and dex...i stayed ripped which PFS recov helped me do. TIl lately.


I know ashwa can cause that stuff tho. It was fine with my dexedrine and some vitamins. It was actually after TEI also. I took this (I think it had a different package then). K1ngs Blood by Olympus Labs

It was really good.

I think the vax and just being shy, and ADHD... maybe autism and ADHD or anxiety/ptsd and ADHD ... made m not see my friends, new people (this was a new city again for me when I moved here really sick end of 2017). I healed, at my parent's house and moved 2019 to an apartment. I think rejecting people and focusing on studying... and then not being able to see people with the pandemic and other shyt like that made me really stressed. Then I reluctantly got the stupid vaccine and it made me get sicker. I appreciate the help tho man.

i remember fearing health issues. and maybe health was slipping ... I feared getting deathly ill again. Maybe, mental health state went down a lot in 2021 end.. 2022. motivation and depression major issues. Not like me, usually up 4am-5am since 2018 mid year and probably up early even 2011-2016. I'd workout, walk. and or workout again and attack the day.

Maybe, health worsened and I just was traumatized with the movement disorder and also scoliosis pain (didn't know what it was... possibly connective tissue disorder also), and I just started giving up a bit.
Not like me...

--Maybe just imbalanced . TEI probably is way better than HRT/TRT. and easier to deal with and gives structure for life. RWAC, GOOSE, NILES, and I did well with it. many others did...
--won't feel bad being on TEI, here and there for life. Cured my asthma mostly 2 years too back in the day (on here and while this was down). damn... i wanted to cont taking it not sure, why things moved out of balance.
--i guess i stopped eating perfectly and taking this... and got sad anyways and then was MORTIFIED when it was hard to walk tho that was scoliosis type shyt.


--just inspiration....

--

--

prefer paleo butya keto etc dana white. feels 35 agn, he had epstein barr... hmm.

 

[MNK99]

Just a reminder shakes always helped me a lot. Post workout, one meal a day... or some pre workout... and some at night... If workout is in morning you can have some aminos/protein and super greens.

vitamins and minerals >>> any supplement. Check this out. And try and remember what kind of shakes I had in 2018 -2021. And all.

Also should have gotten therapist not just ADHD doctor but a therapist in 2019.. and yeah I'd have all my goals done... instead of playing some catch up and fixing some problems work and studies related.


--UPDATE:
--MNK99-- l s. and wrk. and stdy.-- get on t cream. fk it. i cured pfs but have other shyt going on and sadness. so myb that. seems way better than injns. can help me mk routine agn. dex, tcream, vitamins. and go full forth on my stuff. never lev trade agn or barely.. stick to professional school... maybe the creative side but probably the schooling... and ya chalk up some losses but help ppl and mk lots of mny still have a great life... never give up. fixed pssd and pfs.. i think that i needed test eventually but best form is cream. that or carnivore.. i did ru486, fasting, tei, diet/exercise randro. maybe for whatever reason i still needed test. not sure. felt super cured. if im being honest much of depression lately ive considered it other reasons not pfs, but myb just need test cream**.
--if jqd did this and that.. and russo lots of dhb.. and sodium valproate maybe my will/depression is bad only cuz needing test and the cream. transdermal randro and or randro/4andro sitll good..
--but forget prohormones, i did them 5 yrs ago. may as well try this not going back to ru486 this and that. and not just giving up on life. kid u not.. 100 girls loved me and tons ppl .. downtown and i mean i got really down and hurt had a movement disorder and stupidly... being an addict.... I leverage traded way more than studying/ hid, hided didn't say what was going on. was consumed with crypto futures.. and then after that. 1.5 yrs or more.. severe depression. gonna try cream. and then maybe just go to further school in mid 30s at long last and this time when 10/10's want me and they will.. I will go out with them immediately. i think RSD, ADHD, and fear of failure really screwed me up a lot. Maybe I can substack and go to my chosen profession. We will see. feel ashamed things happening later than they shd but ill try. thanks. lv u guys. 2.02.2024 MNK 8.02pm.

 

[MNK99]

Lack of TEI/ should have stuck to that a couple years. I was beyond cured 2018 2019 2020 2021 most of that, but only did tei 2018 end to like 2019 half way... then ashwa.. i didn't crash till like 2 years later and even then mostly social recovery, and some sexual issues, and the like hurt me. It wasn't like depression from PFS, it was more like because of things I lost and could no longer do.

My ashwa helped me be super strong and helped anxiety and shyt.. i just was complacent and didn't need tei at least for a couple years/ and then less activity during parts of the pandemic. AND then, sad over some major trading errors/ and then hiding/ isolation.

Should have used MDMA for PTSD/ anxiety/ opening up to people. Or similar meds.

And should have used TEI ... and maybe cycles of test cream/dht cream but if just wanting to be as perfect as i was and lower anxiety/ fears even more... --> therapy and mdma, and relationships.
AND TEI 3, 4, 5, 6, cycles. Honestly. Otherwise random things need to be taken and where are we going.

Should have opened up more/ and gotten them to cut my hair.... or cut it myself. and yeah I wouldn't have been running away/ isolating to study and realistically (leverage trading instead). then wouldn't have been down the last couple yrs.

 

[MNK99]

random thing for my interest.
i was as ripped as half these pricks... not this fucking guy tho lol

Reddit - Dive into anything

www.reddit.com

 

[MNK99]

vodka for friendship
coke when younger
mdma for trust issue
tei for balance
and electrolytes.
dex for success.
discipline = freedom. discipline over all. i lived like a soldier 2-3 yrs straight and honestly had some disasters not have occurred i still would be. because it is fucking amazing to be balanced and to be able to outrun and outlift and outwork all the competition (the lesser males).


---- for future generations:
--MNK99-- ADHD. test cream or tei....for me. fitness/total health, and mood/mental anxiety, mood, adhd**tei for balance. dex for scs / life. mdma for relnships.
--you need mdma when u are cold and stoic and ppl want to love u. u need tei after post drug disorders. and u need electrolytes to quickly heal. and u need to keep training. and let love open your heart. be who you are meant to be. tell future gens. avenge me. amps for true ADHD. and bullet journalling. dress to impress and for success. love yourself. dance like the ocean's waves.
--don't let em lockdown your kids for a gay virus. and... yeah be good looking. and tall and elegant. be pretty. and keep your genitals working.. only good drugs = stims, and androgens in limited use. and trace elements and electrolytes and empathogens and i guess weed and like NdMA antagonists and like lith orotate... and other shyt. meth is safer than castration drugs. never forget.

cocaine is also safe and good minus fentanyl. get good connects even then tho. u gotta be ny or toronto or canada but with good connections (well i guess also mexico and the like).
i had coke like 2x in ten yrs but like... all the time early 20s.

 

[MNK99]

--Tell your kids if they got disorders and shyt, to get the TEI. for their autism and or ADHD:

 

[MNK99]

Sick of these health weirdos!! and i've been a health wackadoo for 20 years!! I am going out like James Gandolfini except with more blow and vodka and mdma and dex. and for food only chocolate mouse!!

 

[MNK99]

He is good I saw one thing on like... twitter.

this guy has lots of vids this kid. he says.. arl>>>tei. SO did Helen. Then he says TEI. I DID KILLER with TEI. but that is more replacement therapy whereas arl is more permanent? IDK.



--sidenote:
Hybrid animals will take over the north.
and hybrid humans. mixed kids. cool. my eventual kids will be mixed.

 

[Fazed22]

He is good I saw one thing on like... twitter.

this guy has lots of vids this kid. he says.. arl>>>tei. SO did Helen. Then he says TEI. I DID KILLER with TEI. but that is more replacement therapy whereas arl is more permanent? IDK.



--sidenote:
Hybrid animals will take over the north.
and hybrid humans. mixed kids. cool. my eventual kids will be mixed.

A lot of the ARL practioners are against TEI and think ARL works much better, but I think that is mainly because they haven't tried TEI themselves and used ARL to fix their own issues.

.

Has anyone here tried the upgraded ARL supplement line Valence Nutraceuticals supposedly they work a lot better than the ARL supplements so I'm interested in trying their Slow Ox one when it restocks.

If you watch this video I linked, the guys behind these new supplements absolutely suck at explaining why their upgraded formulas work better, it's funny to watch their reasoning.

 

[Fazed22]

He is good I saw one thing on like... twitter.

this guy has lots of vids this kid. he says.. arl>>>tei. SO did Helen. Then he says TEI. I DID KILLER with TEI. but that is more replacement therapy whereas arl is more permanent? IDK.



--sidenote:
Hybrid animals will take over the north.
and hybrid humans. mixed kids. cool. my eventual kids will be mixed.

the right guy didn't age that well it looks like

 

[MNK99]

True... I guess these guys didn't lift nor do skincare stuff. Sunscreen and moisturizer.

 

[MNK99]

I did the test @Fazed22 but I did TEI and ran there's. Helen (Gbolduev) liked ARL way before I ever did it but then said he likes TEI better. Really there are 17+ companies that do this in the USA alone maybe.

SO sticking to one method may be moe important. Samples get different results to the same vendor, let alone between vendors.

TEI helped me even with muscle retention, curing asthma,sleep, deep dreams day one, mood (and i had anxiety and supposed but not really bipolar II pre fin). really i had anxiety, adhd, autism prolly a bit.

Anyways, exact names not that important... but TEI helped me tons. GOOSE12 and also Niles I think and RWAC but some liked ARL better. SOME countries you gotta do what you have access to.

THIS guy made a few nice vids and has a newer company. His mom passed away from Graves disease and an aneurism or something... and He has some issues too. He made some company.

Seen some of his vids on youtube. ALSO I looked 25 at 31... post doing the tei but fasted and took immaculate care of detox, diet, and exercise, meditation etc. NOT everyone in the natural health space is vanity focused like we are (no offense).

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