@Canari it's exactly how I feel all the time, as if I was not connected with my body and with my actions, depersonalization, it's the problem that bothers me most, I do not feel anything in my life, nor do I enjoy anything, it's like I'm in the pilot automatic just doing things
Yes I understand and know what it is, though I feel this occasionally, it correspond to what i said just above your post. As it was mentionned in another topic, by Ghost and others, it is close to a form of ptsd and will have to be addressed. The best way to think about it for the moment, is to understand that this is a
protective mecanism. It is beyond the fight and flight mode. When those 2 Fs do not work, then the body turns to the 3rd, Freeze. It is a form of anestesia, but it is not meant to last. The problem is that when you have a health issue with the "tiger" inside, like chemicals, then your body cannot fight it nor go away, so it "ignores" it, and separates you from feeling it. Even when you get better with a protocole, this leaves some print in the body, so you will have to take care. The good news is that when you live such strong times, and when you do the somatic personal work, it gives you a transformation boost that changes your life for the best, it increases your resilience and makes you stronger for further adverse events. By "somatic" I mean felt-sense, body level, what you feel in your body. Other sources talk about the embodiment of emotions. You describe perfectly that your body feels disconnected. This is not at all psychological, this is physiological, this is not mental, this is really in the body. And this is almost unknow to medicine, psychology, etc. I have even seen a difference from my neuro-science course, because they specialise too much in the limbic brain, and I asked one, she answered she did not know much about the autonomic nervous system. Those who know about it know about neurotransmitors, but these are induced by the nervous system, they are not the nerves.
What I believe too, is that all who experience this disconnection are misunderstood from their relatives. People will not understand that you should just do a will-power effort, have positive thoughts etc. Some of them will make you feel that you deserve what happens to you, or at best they will feel for you but feel powerless to help you. And when they show this and feel bad, you even feel worse because you feel responsible for them, though you are not. The best they can do is give you unconditionnal support and acceptance.
How do I fix this? Definately feels like finasteride blew a fuse in my body / sympathetic system, but don't know how to turn it back on??? So Paraysmpatheitc system will just keep overriding me? What was your suggestion for getting out of this I didn't understand?
1st learn and understand how the ANS works. It is relieving already to know that your reaction is normal. Even if you get better with protocols, you still have to do this, you need both ways, because nervous system is a system, so it can get hurt. The physical part of the body needs repair with protocols, good food and good life-style. The nervous part is electric and needs repair at a level that is different because it is electric if I can say. But I do not believe in cognitive therapy so much for a deep effect, because it is a top-down approach. When you go the bottom-up approach, you address the body sensations directly. There is no recipe/protocol for this because it is your body who does it automatically. We just need to learn how to not oppose the process with our cortex. My 1st suggestion is always to learn with the cortex, so that you know what to "not do", so that your body can do the job.
I have posted quite a lot of stuff in the stress management forum, and whatever is not clear I will explain more there. As I have been through the process myself and still apply it to my life, I know how I do it. As sessions of somatic work for ptsd cost quite a lot, the cheapest I have found, or complementary, is the program of Irene Lyon. The 21 days program is affordable and brings more for the bucks than sessions. I know how it works, and I chose to pay for it last october! And I got some benefits, and I discharged more of my own frozen stuff! And it is paid for life, you can stay in the FB group and go on doing it.
The most important is to inform at the same time your family, so that they know they have to not be affected so that they can help you and sustain you by their own mere life energy. I am sure you all know that you feel better around humans, if they are stable. We are not meant to be Robinson Crusoe without dreaming for a Friday!
