Expendable, Ella log

expendable

Well-Known Member
Messages
133
Psychscansvkit post_id=1038 time=1507754226 user_id=132 said:
Hi Expandable,
Did you have anhedonia, apathy before Ella? If so is that resolving at all?

Not really, actually. I had some symptoms of it but it was intertwined with depression. Or so I think.
 

aztec

Well-Known Member
Messages
264
expendable post_id=1032 time=1507749622 user_id=53 said:
Hello, people. Today's update: No change! Which is a good thing! Right?

I fapped 3 times yesterday, then was able to get a boner again at night without physical stimulation and fapped again. Waking up felt good again this morning (as good as 7 hours of sleep can feel, anyway). I got a boner in class by thinking about sex. All of this stuff is good. My only remaining symptom is still a slight disassociative feeling between dick and brain. It just doesn't feel AS good as it should. Semen quality varies, interestingly enough it's usually much better for the first fap of the day!

I think I mentioned here that I'd be doing noFap but I quickly broke that rule. I don't want to fap for the next couple days at least, though, just to see if there's a difference. It seems to have helped me in the past. Semen quality, at least, got much better, and I was able to feel a lot more. I remember reading somewhere that fapping raises prolactin, too, so I'll give noFap a go for these next few days. On the whole, I feel like I am in much the same position as Trondonac on PSSDforums at this point- much better than a week ago, but not 100%. Maybe like 80%. Definitely, if my girlfriend were here, I would be able to have sex and all. But I'm not sure if I could reach orgasm from only vaginal sex. Oh well.

I believe this weekend is really the critical point. By the end of it, things should be very clear. I'm either going to continue improving off the ella like Trondanac did (he claimed improvements a couple days off the ella, which would be friday or saturday for me), stay the same (doubt it), or regress. But if nothing else, at least the huge difference in sleep and mood is really helping me out! Seriously.

:D
So happy to read about your awesome progress expendable haha! Make sure to save some ammo and let the magnum rest for a while. You definitely don’t want to elevate prolactin at this point. Keep up the exciting progress man and update us daily :)
 

expendable

Well-Known Member
Messages
133
Boop. Today's update is basically the same as yesterday's, which was the same as the day before that. I'm still on Trondanac's timeline (I keep comparing to him because he's the only other person who's logged ella besides me). Just a game of wait and see for now. I'll start updating every other day, instead, unless some drastic change happens.
 

Dark0047

Member
Messages
13
Ependable, if your genital feeling was 10 before taking antidepressants and 0 after taking antidepressants. What to you rate it now after taking ella?
 

expendable

Well-Known Member
Messages
133
Dark0047 post_id=1140 time=1507832360 user_id=124 said:
Ependable, if your genital feeling was 10 before taking antidepressants and 0 after taking antidepressants. What to you rate it now after taking ella?

This is always a tough question to answer with accuracy but I would say, right now, that it's a 4 maybe? Keep in mind, my genital feeling after was about a 2 or 3, so it's more like a 7 out of 10. For sure, it's the least improved symptom. I genuinely don't really have any other symptoms besides that, now.
 

aztec

Well-Known Member
Messages
264
expendable post_id=1142 time=1507833687 user_id=53 said:
Dark0047 post_id=1140 time=1507832360 user_id=124 said:
Ependable, if your genital feeling was 10 before taking antidepressants and 0 after taking antidepressants. What to you rate it now after taking ella?

This is always a tough question to answer with accuracy but I would say, right now, that it's a 4 maybe? Keep in mind, my genital feeling after was about a 2 or 3, so it's more like a 7 out of 10. For sure, it's the least improved symptom. I genuinely don't really have any other symptoms besides that, now.
Sounds like your healing is going well expendable! How were your libido and spontaneous erections before Ella and how are they now since doing your cycle?
 

expendable

Well-Known Member
Messages
133
aztec post_id=1143 time=1507834572 user_id=52 said:
Sounds like your healing is going well expendable! How were your libido and spontaneous erections before Ella and how are they now since doing your cycle?

Okay, my libido was usually okay, in the sense that I still felt the urge to masturbate and all. Like my orgasm, it never took a huge hit from the pssd. It seems basically unchanged, even after the cycle. Maybe a teensy bit better. As for the erections, well, I never got spontaneous ones before the cycle... now I can with a little mental effort :D Not really spontaneous though, but much better than before, when even jerking off barely made me hard. Morning wood comes and goes. Still too early to really tell though.
 

aztec

Well-Known Member
Messages
264
expendable post_id=1168 time=1507851676 user_id=53 said:
aztec post_id=1143 time=1507834572 user_id=52 said:
Sounds like your healing is going well expendable! How were your libido and spontaneous erections before Ella and how are they now since doing your cycle?

Okay, my libido was usually okay, in the sense that I still felt the urge to masturbate and all. Like my orgasm, it never took a huge hit from the pssd. It seems basically unchanged, even after the cycle. Maybe a teensy bit better. As for the erections, well, I never got spontaneous ones before the cycle... now I can with a little mental effort :D Not really spontaneous though, but much better than before, when even jerking off barely made me hard. Morning wood comes and goes. Still too early to really tell though.
Well I wish you unlimited spontaneous boners that will continue after you finish the last 5 grams :lol: Today you finished your cycle? I have a feeling your outcome will be great and the results will stick. This is good news expendable!
 

expendable

Well-Known Member
Messages
133
Progress... is strange. My dick sensitivity actually sloooowly seems to be going up, I can still get thought-boners. But it's still kinda meh. More time is needed! I'll keep you guys posted.
 

wuf

Well-Known Member
Messages
880
expendable post_id=1349 time=1508009525 user_id=53 said:
Progress... is strange. My dick sensitivity actually sloooowly seems to be going up, I can still get thought-boners. But it's still kinda meh. More time is needed! I'll keep you guys posted.

Fingers crossed.
 

Shadow

Moderator
Messages
383
Daaaaaaamn [mention]expendable[/mention] !!! So happy to read about your progress brother!!
 

Dark0047

Member
Messages
13
Expendable, please keep us updated. It is really good that your dick sensitivity is going up. I am so happy for your progress
 

expendable

Well-Known Member
Messages
133
Morning wood today, guys! Dick sensitivity ever so slightly better. And dreams!

For me, morning wood and dreaming are a very good sign. Back when I tried some other stuff, I usually got dreaming/wood around the third day after I took it (SP, then licorice and kudzu roots). If it stays, this is It. Fingers crossed, yeah?
 

aztec

Well-Known Member
Messages
264
expendable post_id=1450 time=1508094397 user_id=53 said:
Morning wood today, guys! Dick sensitivity ever so slightly better. And dreams!

For me, morning wood and dreaming are a very good sign. Back when I tried some other stuff, I usually got dreaming/wood around the third day after I took it (SP, then licorice and kudzu roots). If it stays, this is It. Fingers crossed, yeah?
Freaking exciting news expendable! Keep the healing rolling. I am happy for you and I just picked up my Ella. I will make a log soon and post before I begin.
 

Snow1

Well-Known Member
Messages
180
Awesome expendable!!! Keep the updates flowing and good luck Aztec with your trial.
 

aztec

Well-Known Member
Messages
264
Snow1 post_id=1561 time=1508152502 user_id=68 said:
Awesome expendable!!! Keep the updates flowing and good luck Aztec with your trial.
Thanks Snow and keep us posted expendable :D
 

expendable

Well-Known Member
Messages
133
Hey guys. Dick sensitivity FEELS like it's going up. Maybe I'm crazy or imagining things. All I know is I whipped that sucker out today (because I can't do nofap, lol), choked it, and it felt pretty damn good, alright. Stayed rock hard with little effort. Because I have no other symptoms, the only way to test out where I am is, funny enough, to jerk off. And this time I didn't need to squeeze with all my might.

Stay tuned!