Rid's Log (return to Pre-PFS State and the final stretch)

[Niles]

Can you please provide a link to the protocol you are referring to? Also looking for any clear protocol for penile fibrosis. Former accutane use. Use adderal today. Just saw Irwin Goldstein. Very disturbing news. Thanks.

Unfortunately, Adderall will only exacerbate fibrosis since the epinephrinergic effects will reduce circulation down there. You can improve fibrosis with restored circulation over time, and a couple of other tricks to dissolve scar tissue. Things that will help are beet juice, arginine, 5mg tadalafil EOD, pycnogenol, alternating hot/cold exposure to pelvic region (w/ shower or sitz baths), and a DMSO/iodine solution applied topically. Alpha 1 blockers could also help, but many here would probably advise against them. I haven't tried alpha blockers personally, but I've read good accounts of restored genital circulation.

 

[TubZy]

@Rid how are you doing now man?

 

[Rid]

Not bad. still out of PFS state but my libido and sexual sides persist. my body is still very sensitive and I do very well on a strict diet and lifestyle. I think it's mostly fibrosis and venous leakage that's holding me back from 100% recovery. things may eventually come back online, but I'm still not the sexual being I once was.

I've been super productive and I'm happy to not be a zombie anymore, but it's still concerning that my hands feet and corpus spongisum can get freezing cold and have essentially no feeling. I pinched my dick last night after it got super cold out of the blue and I just couldn't feel anything. dead nerves I suppose. my foot has had a cut on it that hasn't healed in over 6 months now. corpus spongisum is essentially dead still. cialis, beets, arginine are good band aids but full recovery may take much more time and may never fully come.

I'm still trying to get an ultrasound for my penis, anyone know how to even go about this? all the docs i've spoken with seem like they don't even know what I'm talking about. it's ridiculous.

I wanted to get off everything for a couple of weeks to see where I was at, and unfortunately sexual improvements just didn't stick fully. It seems like my mind has a penis-brain connection like before, but my body just can't hold the blood flow unless I have constant stimulation or if I kink the blood vessels somewhere like a garden hose. I'm curious what @gbolduev or @mattyb think about freezing extremities and failure of corpus spongisum to properly receive blood flow and sensation.

 

[MNK99]

"I'm still trying to get an ultrasound for my penis, anyone know how to even go about this? all the docs i've spoken with seem like they don't even know what I'm talking about. it's ridiculous. "

I found a good endocrinologist I think. And they'll send me for that if I want --- they brought it up after I explained my history. I told them I have neurological, physiological, and sexual side effects and they asked some pertinent questions, I showed them my previous blood test/hormone test. I told her about the atrophy and she mentioned getting ultrasound, I said I'll wait. I went thru a couple family docs and I know the struggle of finding a good doctor (all mine are 2800km east).
Also get a urologist -- surely they know what tf you're talking about when it comes to this.

Good to be productive man. I am mostly too, but also enraged a bit.
Dead nerves... - I had stinging pain when I was healing from PSSD and PMO -- eventually. Numbness and stuff went away, but orgasms and such were painful. During nofap and nocturnal emissions, the pain was the worst, but it was healing. I'm sure eventually I'll have that return with pfs as well.

Anyways you're almost there man, keep at it.

 

[K8668B]

Don't say that Rid! Keep pushing man! I have my moods on certain days too. But I'm quite optimistic today . I was reading some positive stuff from Chi's recovery posted in the recoveries on swolesource.

 

[Niles]

Hey man, there have been people who've recovered after having had dead dick for much longer than you, and @wuf can attest to the fact that even very scary penile changes can be reversed in time.

I imagine it's hard, because if I were you I'd be annoyed that even though I feel more or less "normal", I still can't eat like shit, drink a few times a week, slack on the exercise, etc - but you're on the home stretch! The progress you've already made is absolutely incredible and inspiring!

I also read Chi's log recently, and in the 4 months or so before his 100% lasting recovery, he slacked on his protocol a few times when he thought he was recovered and backslid a bit. But, when you're in that 90% range and seeing the light, just a few more months of solid healthy living and listening to your body is what'll get you the rest of the way. Seriously, go check out Chi's member story on propeciahelp and you'll see that he reported recovery like 4 different times in his last 4 months of PFS lol. Just gotta be persistent for that last 10% and it'll come.

 

[wuf]

Not bad. still out of PFS state but my libido and sexual sides persist. my body is still very sensitive and I do very well on a strict diet and lifestyle. I think it's mostly fibrosis and venous leakage that's holding me back from 100% recovery. things may eventually come back online, but I'm still not the sexual being I once was.

I've been super productive and I'm happy to not be a zombie anymore, but it's still concerning that my hands feet and corpus spongisum can get freezing cold and have essentially no feeling. I pinched my dick last night after it got super cold out of the blue and I just couldn't feel anything. dead nerves I suppose. my foot has had a cut on it that hasn't healed in over 6 months now. corpus spongisum is essentially dead still. cialis, beets, arginine are good band aids but full recovery may take much more time and may never fully come.

I'm still trying to get an ultrasound for my penis, anyone know how to even go about this? all the docs i've spoken with seem like they don't even know what I'm talking about. it's ridiculous.

I wanted to get off everything for a couple of weeks to see where I was at, and unfortunately sexual improvements just didn't stick fully. It seems like my mind has a penis-brain connection like before, but my body just can't hold the blood flow unless I have constant stimulation or if I kink the blood vessels somewhere like a garden hose. I'm curious what @gbolduev or @mattyb think about freezing extremities and failure of corpus spongisum to properly receive blood flow and sensation.

I don't think it is related to carvernous corpus or fibrosis.
Check it if it makes you feel better, but I have been thru all different kind of sensations, emotions, stimulation etc and I can see that everything change a lot day by day.
I make a concrete example.. at time I can't get it up cause I feel fatigued, then 30 minutes later or 2hours later I get it 100% strong ever penis, big strong, sensation etc is there, how can it depend from corpus cavernosous? if they are damaged, they are Always damaged, no way, you wouldnt get 100% erection I guess.
Our issue is a system/connection issue, I guess it is mostly related to the central nervous system that is not able to support us and makes us feeling fatigued.
Can you ever get a full 100% erection?

 

[Rid]

I don't think it is related to carvernous corpus or fibrosis.
Check it if it makes you feel better, but I have been thru all different kind of sensations, emotions, stimulation etc and I can see that everything change a lot day by day.
I make a concrete example.. at time I can't get it up cause I feel fatigued, then 30 minutes later or 2hours later I get it 100% strong ever penis, big strong, sensation etc is there, how can it depend from corpus cavernosous? if they are damaged, they are Always damaged, no way, you wouldnt get 100% erection I guess.
Our issue is a system/connection issue, I guess it is mostly related to the central nervous system that is not able to support us and makes us feeling fatigued.
Can you ever get a full 100% erection?

100% erections happen rarely, if ever off sups. I have a passable erection, shaft can usually be strong, but the head gets very little blood flow. it's always deflated, but luckily it looks normal enough. sp sufferers seem to have this issue in common. I was reading on peyronies forums and they have the same issue, corpus spongisum fibrosis and their symptoms seem to mimic our sexual ones. cold dick, curving, loss of length/girth, pain, etc etc. heat therapy seems to be helping a lot. all signs point towards venous leakage and/or fibrosis, but we'll see what the future holds.

Don't get me wrong boys, I'm still optimistic, I know i'll be at 100 soon enough, I've been doing really well recently, staying busy and staying off the forums which is a nice break. guess I'm just being impatient. I'm so close and the last stubborn bit of healing can't happen quick enough. thanks for the support guys.

 

[wuf]

100% erections happen rarely, if ever off sups. I have a passable erection, shaft can usually be strong, but the head gets very little blood flow. it's always deflated, but luckily it looks normal enough. sp sufferers seem to have this issue in common. I was reading on peyronies forums and they have the same issue, corpus spongisum fibrosis and their symptoms seem to mimic our sexual ones. cold dick, curving, loss of length/girth, pain, etc etc. heat therapy seems to be helping a lot. all signs point towards venous leakage and/or fibrosis, but we'll see what the future holds.

Don't get me wrong boys, I'm still optimistic, I know i'll be at 100 soon enough, I've been doing really well recently, staying busy and staying off the forums which is a nice break. guess I'm just being impatient. I'm so close and the last stubborn bit of healing can't happen quick enough. thanks for the support guys.

Listen, I have been there for a long time, I was having your same thouth, so not blaming you..but it has gone, so I guess it is more an hormonal/nervouse issue that doesn't allow your penis to fully get up. I have been there, really..LOL, I remember having a 65% erection maximum and head so floppy.. at the time I even didn't think it could ever be cavernous etc issue...and I was right.

 

[bruschi11]

Listen, I have been there for a long time, I was having your same thouth, so not blaming you..but it has gone, so I guess it is more an hormonal/nervouse issue that doesn't allow your penis to fully get up. I have been there, really..LOL, I remember having a 65% erection maximum and head so floppy.. at the time I even didn't think it could ever be cavernous etc issue...and I was right.

I haven’t studied the penis and these types of issues at all. I just think we have so much evidence in the past of guys fully recovering everything that it makes sense not to worry about it.

I mean, the way my penis looked in summer compared to what it looks like now is pretty incredible the difference. I’m sure there are some issues with it besides erection quality but my stunts of really good periods make me believe I should be able to get those consistent in time.

@Rid just keep on going man, what else is there to do? You just gotta do what you were doing, look back at what you’ve accomplished thus far and think about it.

Was it that hard? Did it suck living that way?

Or was it fucking awesome day by day seeing yourself get better and better? Look at it like that, how amazing it is seeing yourself improve. Grasp those times in the past when you saw your greatest improvements and pull them in knowing they were times where you really accomplished so much. Now go do it again, but do it even better this time. Rinse and repeat.

That’s what we all gotta do boys. Just repetitive self improvement until we get there!

 

[Rid]

thought I'd give a quick update,

things have been decent. Sex drive dropped off and I've been staying busy enough to where it hasn't really been bothering me, just sucks that I don't have the sexual energy when I have the opportunity. I used minox for around 2 weeks and it was clearly messing with me. I always thought anyone who claimed sides from minox was dealing with mental sides, but it's clear that I'm hyper sensitive to this stuff and I did experience anti androgen sides from it.

Recently I haven't been able to kick this cold. I think this is a good sign. I feel pretty drained, but I still feel good. To me it means that my immune system is back online, so weird how PFS people don't get immune reactions from viruses when they're in the worst of it. I can guarantee that your body is still under attack, your immune system just isn't registering the attackers, so you don't get that flu-like feeling. So mine seems to be improving, I just hope it doesn't get hyper sensitive like it was when I was experiencing CFS symptoms some years ago.

It's hard to gauge exactly where I'm at, but I still feel very close despite my recent shortcomings. Minox was a bad choice, and it effected me, but maybe it'll upregulate something. I still haven't had a true crash in months now, which is essential in recovery I believe.

Going to cycle prog, trib, maybe ru with lic root as @IHateFin and others have been doing after I get completely back on my feet. I experienced my first positives in this thing after crashing myself on trib and lic root, I didn't realize that connection at the time, but I think there's definitely something here as far as nudging things back online.

I also wanna stress the importance of relaxing your parasympathetic nervous system. I see @Canari talking about it all the time, and I don't think it's properly appreciated in this community. I believe every one of us has a form of anxiety or even PTSD from our PFS and that even though our problem is very physical, there is a huge mental component. I feel completely recovered when I can really get comfortable and relaxed and when everything else is in place, but it seems like it's harder to get to that point now, and it seems like the connection with my parasympathetic nervous system has been damaged, as I'm sure many other systems have been. All part of the process and the recovery.

Stay strong people, still moving forward!

 

[IHateFin]

thought I'd give a quick update,

things have been decent. Sex drive dropped off and I've been staying busy enough to where it hasn't really been bothering me, just sucks that I don't have the sexual energy when I have the opportunity. I used minox for around 2 weeks and it was clearly messing with me. I always thought anyone who claimed sides from minox was dealing with mental sides, but it's clear that I'm hyper sensitive to this stuff and I did experience anti androgen sides from it.

Recently I haven't been able to kick this cold. I think this is a good sign. I feel pretty drained, but I still feel good. To me it means that my immune system is back online, so weird how PFS people don't get immune reactions from viruses when they're in the worst of it. I can guarantee that your body is still under attack, your immune system just isn't registering the attackers, so you don't get that flu-like feeling. So mine seems to be improving, I just hope it doesn't get hyper sensitive like it was when I was experiencing CFS symptoms some years ago.

It's hard to gauge exactly where I'm at, but I still feel very close despite my recent shortcomings. Minox was a bad choice, and it effected me, but maybe it'll upregulate something. I still haven't had a true crash in months now, which is essential in recovery I believe.

Going to cycle prog, trib, maybe ru with lic root as @IHateFin and others have been doing after I get completely back on my feet. I experienced my first positives in this thing after crashing myself on trib and lic root, I didn't realize that connection at the time, but I think there's definitely something here as far as nudging things back online.

I also wanna stress the importance of relaxing your parasympathetic nervous system. I see @Canari talking about it all the time, and I don't think it's properly appreciated in this community. I believe every one of us has a form of anxiety or even PTSD from our PFS and that even though our problem is very physical, there is a huge mental component. I feel completely recovered when I can really get comfortable and relaxed and when everything else is in place, but it seems like it's harder to get to that point now, and it seems like the connection with my parasympathetic nervous system has been damaged, as I'm sure many other systems have been. All part of the process and the recovery.

Stay strong people, still moving forward!

great outlook, my man!

i personally would hold off on the progesterone for now unless the doses of ru you will be running will be at least 25 mg daily.
if you choose micro dose you wont need it.
in my opinion progesterone supplimentation makes ppl feel better as taking finasteride again may make someone feel better or taking a nandralone since its feeding into the new homeostasis. some ppl do snap back from prog cycles tho, but its def my least fave route.

 

[Snow1]

thought I'd give a quick update,

things have been decent. Sex drive dropped off and I've been staying busy enough to where it hasn't really been bothering me, just sucks that I don't have the sexual energy when I have the opportunity. I used minox for around 2 weeks and it was clearly messing with me. I always thought anyone who claimed sides from minox was dealing with mental sides, but it's clear that I'm hyper sensitive to this stuff and I did experience anti androgen sides from it.

Recently I haven't been able to kick this cold. I think this is a good sign. I feel pretty drained, but I still feel good. To me it means that my immune system is back online, so weird how PFS people don't get immune reactions from viruses when they're in the worst of it. I can guarantee that your body is still under attack, your immune system just isn't registering the attackers, so you don't get that flu-like feeling. So mine seems to be improving, I just hope it doesn't get hyper sensitive like it was when I was experiencing CFS symptoms some years ago.

It's hard to gauge exactly where I'm at, but I still feel very close despite my recent shortcomings. Minox was a bad choice, and it effected me, but maybe it'll upregulate something. I still haven't had a true crash in months now, which is essential in recovery I believe.

Going to cycle prog, trib, maybe ru with lic root as @IHateFin and others have been doing after I get completely back on my feet. I experienced my first positives in this thing after crashing myself on trib and lic root, I didn't realize that connection at the time, but I think there's definitely something here as far as nudging things back online.

I also wanna stress the importance of relaxing your parasympathetic nervous system. I see @Canari talking about it all the time, and I don't think it's properly appreciated in this community. I believe every one of us has a form of anxiety or even PTSD from our PFS and that even though our problem is very physical, there is a huge mental component. I feel completely recovered when I can really get comfortable and relaxed and when everything else is in place, but it seems like it's harder to get to that point now, and it seems like the connection with my parasympathetic nervous system has been damaged, as I'm sure many other systems have been. All part of the process and the recovery.

Stay strong people, still moving forward!

Thanks for the update RID - I’m following this thread as we both suffer from sides from Minox. Very interested to hear of your progress! Good luck brother

 

[Rid]

finally got my ARL results: i'm a slow oxidizer. sorry for the shit quality. no better options. calcium sky high and sod/potas concerningly low. thoughts?

 

[barbaar]

Looks very similar to my test!

 

[Rid]

Looks very similar to my test!

You just started with your sups right?

 

[Niles]

@Rid It looks like your sodium/potassium ratio is low as well. Do you feel burned out?

 

[Rid]

@Rid It looks like your sodium/potassium ratio is low as well. Do you feel burned out?

Yeah, my cfs symptoms have been bad for ever, but getting better slowly

 

[barbaar]

You just started with your sups right?

Yeah I have them all right here. I'm going to start tomorrow morning. I read the program for slow oxidizers can cause insomnia at first and I had terrible sleep all week so I want to get one solid night in before starting.

 

[Rid]

Yeah I have them all right here. I'm going to start tomorrow morning. I read the program for slow oxidizers can cause insomnia at first and I had terrible sleep all week so I want to get one solid night in before starting.

good to know. where can I find your exact results? I checked your logs and didn't see, but i'm on my phone.